Cocks are like snowflakes.

Cock, penis, wang, doodle and dick. Whatever you want to call them, each one is unique. It’s actually one of the most interesting parts of my job; to observe the different forms of the male organ.

Don’t get me wrong, looking at cocks isn’t all I do. I wanted to write about some BDSM to start with but I guess I had cocks on the brain (when don’t I) and this post just made itself.

There a small dicks, average cocks, mushroom penises, circumcised and sheathed. The reason I wanted to write this post is that I have discovered a new type of penis. I had heard of a myth on a humorous image board I frequent, but you’d be a fool to believe anything printed there so I dismissed it. But the other day the myth became reality.

When a session begins the client is, or soon becomes, naked. My eye always goes straight for the penis; I’m just a pervert in that way. Even if this wasn’t so, once we add the obligatory cock tie you can’t help but notice the form of the genitalia. So I began a session last week and I noticed a strange phenomenon. The client’s penis had no head. Upon closer inspection (a subtle focusing of the eye, not an embarrassing craning of the head) I realise his foreskin was covering the head. No, I’m not stupid, I’ve seen uncircumcised cocks (and personally prefer them) but this was different. At the tip of the foreskin there was only a tiny hole. I realised this cock was way different from anything I had seen before. There was no way the foreskin was coming back. The hole was literally the size of the eye of an ordinary penis. Inside I had a little freak out, “What happens when he gets hard” I thought. Will it just explode? Will he be in pain? Don’t worry, everything was ok. He got hard and he came, well he wept.

Now I was so amazed by this new type of penis that I immediately told as many people as I could, just to get an idea of how many had come across this phenomenon before. It was a shock to most. Some had heard of the myth but never seen it.

Then, when I didn’t think I could be more amazed, Whammo! I get a client today with the same penis. No freakin’ joke. Literally within 1 week I had 2 clients with a “draw-string penis”. Now I’m not sure of the scientific term and I could research like a good writer, but fuck it. I’m tired. Instead I bequeath thee “The Kenny” (yes, as in South Park).

Now beloved reader, don’t get me wrong. All cocks are great. If you have a ‘Kenny’ I’d love to hear about it. I was just so surprised as I thought I’d seen them all, but I was wrong. Cocks really are like snowflakes.

Stay tuned for more cock chaos.